And Now For Something Completely Different

Bristol Palin's due date is this Saturday, so.... any day now we get something fun to talk about again, and Sarah gets to give more interviews, saying how nice and normal everything is in her life, and how thinking about 2012 is totally not what is going on her head all the fucking time. 

But seriously though, it is. PALIN'12!

Oh, Rick Warren, You

Good ol' Barack Obama. Standing up for the millions who came out in favor of Change in Washington, President-Elect Obama asked Rick Warren, of the Saddleback [McCain-in-a-cone-of-silince-not-really-we-were-just-lying-on-national-tv] Church Forum fame to give the invocation on his Big Day, January 20th. Y'know, the swearing in?

This is only noteworthy, because, it turns out [everyone knows this] Rick Warren is not change, and, more importantly, sucks and is a liar. And is disingenuous. And kind of a dick. Yeah, ok, you might say that I'm being rude, and that both he [the gotee-clad bigot] and the President-Elect are trying to foster an air of civility in this country, asking the citizenry to not react negatively to ideas, but to discus them in a thoughtful, civil manner. To that end, Warren compares gay marriage [entered into by two consenting adults who would like very much to spend their lives together] to pedophilia, incest, and polygamy. 

Civil, indeed. Prick.

People I Would Make an Ass Out of Myself in Front of if I Ever Met Them

Here, for your chewing-over pleasure, I am providing a list of the top people I can think of [off the top of my head] who would turn me into a blabbering idiot if I ever got to meet them in person. You know, the sort of "Uh.... Nice to meet you! Hi! Big fan! You... Hi! How are you? You're just great!....." while my eyes glaze over, and I possibly pass out.

1.) Rachel Maddow

Uh, duh. She's fantastic, brilliant, almost always wrong [Obama can't win the nomination, can't beat McCain], but still going strong!

2.) Stephanie Miller

She's probably the best talk show host I've ever heard, and certainly the funniest. Not to mention, smart, nuts, and an ardent supporter of alcoholism!

3.) Sarah Vowell

I like her books. She's really smart. I think this is a theme.

4.) Mittens

I really think Mitt Romney will be President someday, or at least VP. And not for no reason. Aside from the whole Mormon thing, he's a decent average Republican.

5.) Tina Fey

If you don't know why, you are one of those people who should be watching NBC on Thursday nights at 9:30, but isn't. You suck. Stop sucking.

6.) Joe Biden

I might be able to get out a few sentances, since he seems actually personable, but I think I'd end up looking like a twit anyway.

7.) I like the number seven more than I like six, so it's either take Joe off the list and stick with 5, or come up with a 7. Uh... Alec Baldwin. There we go. Reasons are listed under item 5. Stop sucking.

What I REALLY Think About Barack Obama

I kinda of think one of two things about Barack Obama. Either he is the coolest customer the USA has ever seen in a President-Elect, OR he isn't thinking about a second term. Personally, I'm hoping for the latter.

Now, don't start yelling at me or anything, but just take a second and think about how much he could actually acomplish if he did what he thought needed to be done, instead of caring about The Numbers, or what uninformed undecideds might be thinking in less than four years. The irony here is that if he thinks and acts like that, most likely his numbers will skyrocket, thus making a second term a very real possibilty. 

You know what else would be a good idea? Fixing our tax system. Reagan broke it, let's fix it. This will never happen, but if you look at the economic history of the United States since the institution of the Federal Income Tax, basically 1913-now, everytime we've had a booming growing economy the top tax rate was, how do I put this... a bit higher than it is today. In fact, even the lowest of the "high tax rates" spurred the economy on to growth. You can read more over at Larry Beinhart's blog, which I found FASCINATING. Please read it. You wouldn't think that the country would do well with a top tax rate of 88-94%, would you? You'd be quite wrong.

Things to be Thankful For

1.) We are going to have a president who never (to our knowledge) sang a song about bombing a foreign power.

2.) Sarah Palin is still saying things in front of cameras.

3.) Alan Colmes removing the sorta-kinda-not-really fairness from Hannity & Colmes [himself]. Have fun pretending it's fair and balanced now.

4.) Tim Pawlenty not being a partisan prick in terms of the Minnesota recount, no matter how hard FauxNews pundits try to bait him. Here's to REAL (not idiotic neocons) Republicans making a comeback, and making the debate less... Evil.

5.) Stephen Colbert's Christmas Special.

6.) Not having to sit through John McCain's Nov. 4th victory speech. Imagine how horrible that would have been! Jeez!

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Wet Mittens

Do you think Mitt Romney cries himself to sleep every single day Sarah Palin comes out and says something else stupid? The poor man should have had her job, and everyone knows it. Not the governance-of-crappy-iced-over-wilderness job, but the I-wanna-be-second-in-line-to-run-this-place job.

Seriously, do you think Mittens would stand in front of somebody killing ANYthing and have a camera pointed at him for any period of time, let alone over three minutes? That woman has the political savvy of a... well, a turkey. That poor man's Mormon undies have more skills that she has in her whole person.

I can't help but feel for the guy.

Blerg!